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The Prosecution: Beth

At times I'm recorded while I’m eating. I’ll see myself on her social media – it’s like a sudden shock.

A close companion of a decade, Marielle, labels herself the “content queen”. It’s fun for a bit, but it strains our relationship.

Being highly outgoing, she feels the need to document everything all the time. During meals out, her motto is, “The phone eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which makes me cringe. I don’t like it when strangers see her posing or filming – I get vicarious awkwardness. It also frustrates me because the food gets cold.

She isn’t exactly an influencer yet, but she is aspiring to become one. She makes vlogs about city life, a day in her life, and her styling career. Her content is good, credit where it's due, but I prefer not to be involved. Sometimes I'm captured while dining, or simply tagging along. I’ll see myself on her Instagram later, and it pops up like a jumpscare: I might be bare-faced, making a strange expression or photographed mid-bite. It feels invasive.

She also anticipates that I will to record her at inopportune moments. Sometimes I'm in conversation to another person, or we’ll just be hanging out in the street. The dynamic feels like our bond has transformed into me serving as her free crew. She could easily hire someone if she wanted high-quality content. When I brought up my unease about this arrangement, she brushed it off. She’s taken me to a couple of brand events, which were appreciated, but that doesn't compensate for all the energy I spend helping her create material.

I appreciate that she has helped me with my career in design, but I don’t want our friendship to become just a ledger of favours. I don’t feel she's insincere or inauthentic, but at times I feel that if recording starts, we will begin acting in a way that presents a favorable image for her vlog.

She will say, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and film me laughing with another. It feels forced. I need her to recognize that our decade-long friendship still has limits. I enjoy being with her, but I also desire to experience it without being recorded, altered, or shared for an viewers. I’m not a prop for her online persona.

The Defence: The Content Creator's View

I hope my friend to see that the creations we produce together can get us a foot in the door.

I love shooting content. It’s not just a pastime; it's integral to who I am. Creating videos and sharing my life online allows me to show my personality and connect with people in new ways.

I don’t see myself as a full influencer yet, but it’s smart to make money from your interests. I admire people on TikTok who execute that aesthetic of informal, self-made film-making.

Creating content is my version of engaging with life: noticing the details, sharing them with an viewership that appreciates the craft behind it. I never intend to make my friend uncomfortable. Taking her to professional gatherings was my method of sharing opportunities, giving her a opportunity to witness behind-the-scenes moments that could benefit her professional path too. That’s not leverage, it's simply being realistic.

I would take her to such functions even if she refused to assist me, but I desire her to see what the work we create together can get us: an opening. I understand not all people likes being on camera, but sometimes spontaneity is what makes material genuine. Appearing on video from time to time is part and parcel of being my friend. I would delete anything she asked, but she has never asked yet.

I don’t expect anybody to be my private videographer, but friends help each other in minor capacities. I thought recording a short video here or there would be fun for Beth. Creativity flourishes in collaboration, and having my friend around makes endeavors lively and pleasurable. I never force her to participate in anything, and I would never intentionally embarrass her. But creating content jointly occasionally is part of how I document our shared experiences.

I cherish our friendship deeply and want to avoid making videos to drive a wedge between us. I am ready to find middle ground: like requesting permission before filming, and avoiding angles that might make her uncomfortable.

This is not about power, it’s about expressing my perspective while still respecting hers. Obviously making content is not a replacement for genuine friendship: it's merely part of how I live my life and I want her to be included in a way that’s enjoyable for both of us.

The Jury: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop recording herself and Beth when they are socializing?

Nothing is more uncomfortable than having a companion point a camera at you. I get that it's her job, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my workplace. Maybe she can find influencer friends to collaborate with. With the dark, looming future of technology, human connections are the only thing we have – don’t waste them!
Liberty, 25

When pursuing something as a career, you can’t ask your friends for help every time, even if they have done it before. If Marielle loves shooting, that doesn't imply everyone around her is willing material. She needs to honor her friend's personal space.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love producing videos and showing off her life publicly, but it’s not for everyone. It was kind she has helped her friend professionally, but she must to listen to what her friend desires.
A commenter, 27

It sounds like you care about each other, so hold on to that and ensure it’s the priority in your friendship. Foster some authentic memories, where true emotions are stored, not online archives. In fact, celebrities who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it seems.
One opinion, 53

Marielle appears to be neither present nor genuine when she’s with Beth – she's on the job. Each appears unsure as to what’s reasonable. The solution lies not in trying to alter one another, but in each setting defined boundaries around what is comfortable to them and seeing if there is an mutually agreeable compromise.
A final view, 71

Your Turn to Be the Judge

Consider this question: has she been exploiting their bond?